I Don’t Really Wanna Be the Queen

We’re 3 hours, 31 minutes away from Forks, in case you were wondering!

Did I say I was going to enjoy Skate America?  Well, I am enjoying SA actually, because I get to see all my skating girls who live in different parts of the country.  But maybe I forgot how intense competition gets!

I love it, on top of how stressed I am.  I really do love it.  I think I strive on being stressed.  That means I’m Type A, I think, and I’m prone to heart attacks and strokes and like everything that can go wrong in one’s later life.  (Not like I’m not at risk for anything right now, haha, that was supposed to be sarcastic.)  Anyway, I got the title from my favorite song, “Meet Virginia” by Train.  The girl in that song is so badass and I feel like I just want to be her, even though she obviously sucks at life.  The song is basically saying that all you need to be in life is badass, and if you totally fail, there are still about 50,000 things that are awesome about you.  She always contradicts herself and the guy things that’s cool.  And you don’t even have to want to be on top – you can be totally happy with your life just because you like it.  And maybe she’s being forced into being “the queen” by her parents or social pressure and she has to realize that’s not for her.  (Politics aren’t for everyone, haha.)  So there are some good messages in there, lol.

In other news, I pretty much finished my profile for OWT, so it should be on their website soon.  When it’s up there, I’ll post a link in my “Who Am I?” section.  (By the way, on the Train cd that has “Meet Virginia” on it, there’s a song called “I Am” and I just randomly thought of it, lol.)

Also relating to “Meet Virginia”, it kind-of goes in with how my parents thought I’d be a pro Irish Dancer instead of a figure skater.  I fell in love with skating and they couldn’t pull me away.  It’s a gooooood thing!  We did our short programs today and GUESS WHO’S IN FIRST PLACE?!?!?!?!?!?!

ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I about fell over.  I was sitting, but I totally almost fell off the couch and Coach OH! had to catch me.  It was INSANE.  I guess I am skilled.  That sounds conceited, I know, but I have been out of skating for 6 months, so it surprised me, if you couldn’t tell.

So why did I title this entry “I Don’t Really Wanna Be the Queen”, if I’m totally elated about my win?  (Although that’s a technical win so I had it going for me because technique comes back to me before style, as witnessed in regionals, but STILL.  And I can’t be too hopeful of course, we still have LPs tomorrow!)  Because I’m stressed and I was flipping out about Vancouver.  Could I handle all the stress of the Olympics?  Even though I LOVE being stressed?  Because I also have to get my things ready for college, and pack and stuff and I found out I’m going to get there a week late because of nationals (in CLEVELAND, I think I mentioned that earlier… v. bitter).  I don’t know if I can commit.  Well, I mean I have to because skating is my life and my deferred admission would be totally wasted, not to mention I would hate myself, but I’m still kind-of doubting myself.  I mean, I’m missing a week right off the bat and I’m not even sick.  That’s a first for me, LOL!  (I was homeschooled so taking a week off for nationals or whatever before was NEVER a big deal.)

But I talked to Coach OH! about how stressed I was, and I felt much better.  I guess I just had to talk about it.

Then she thinks about her scene, pulls her hair back as she screams

 

I JUST REALLY WANNA BE THE QUEEN!!!!!!!!!!!!

How far away from Forks are we?

I just arrived in Everett, WA for Skate America!  Practice starts tomorrow and then SA starts for me on Saturday!  I have been training like crazy which is partly why I haven’t posted for awhile.  The other reason is that I lost my ethernet cable for awhile so I couldn’t get on the internet with my laptop (and my parents weren’t willing to let me use theirs because my dad had something for work).

Anyway, I was just wondering how close we are to Forks, from Twilight.  I’m not really a fan of the books but a lot of my friends are.  I might mapquest it later.  I’ll have more after SA is over!

When the stars have all gone out

I hate to bitch about my medical issues so much on here, but this whole thing with Dr. K. not wanting me to skate is driving me NUTS, so I guess it applies.  I had to go back today to do more tests and her verdict was basically that I definitely should not be skating and that I need to get some things taken care of first.

DR K.!  This is the qualifying season!  If I don’t get to sectionals, there’s no Nationals, and if I don’t get to Nationals, there’s no Worlds, and if I don’t get to Worlds there are absolutely positively no Olympics.  So what did I do?  I said “Thank you for your time and opinion” and walked straight out of that stupid hospital.  Mom finally caught up to me and was beyond pissed.  I think I was pretty justified.  Maybe Dr. K. just doesn’t understand that skating is my LIFE.  I told my mom I had to get to practice.  Ugh, and I’m not even looking forward to Nationals, they are in Ohio, and I dunno, Ohio seems really boring.  I guess I can’t say anything, though, because I live in a ridiculously small town.  But still.  I kind-of hate Maine Medical Center at the moment and am not planning on going back there anytime soon.

To piss me off even more, a friend-who-shall-remain-nameless is suddenly in a bad mood 24/7.  I don’t think she’s mad at me, she’s just taking it out on me and it’s annoying!

Also, the OWT packet asked me if I would send a profile to a girl named Kira.  It’s kind-of like a Facebook profile but a little different.  It’s for their website.  I’m excited because it really means I’m part of the group now!  I’m filling it out this very moment.

Basically My Entire Week

Let’s start off with lovely Dr. K. on Thursday.  I went in today for a checkup after my lovely nosebleed disaster, and she was like, oh, let’s do some more tests.  I said no, I feel fine, I don’t think you need to.  She insisted on doing the standard blood tests and everything, so I was really mad because I was supposed to be practicing for Skate America and Coach OH! was going to kill me.  We had to wait for the blood labs and then go back and by that time Dr. K. was supposed to be with another patient so we ended up waiting for an extra hour.

Dr. K. was like, I don’t think it’s a great idea to be skating right now.  I said that was stupid, this is a key qualifying season for me because Nationals and Worlds are going to determine the Olympic team and you have got to be kidding me.  So I’m skating but she’s not happy.

I am so pumped for Skate America though!  It’s next Thursday and Coach OH! and I are going crazy over it.  I kind-of flopped at regionals (for me, but not for not skating) and she really wants me to place in Skate America if I want to move up and get on the team for Vancouver.  Um, yeah!  Also, we would love for me to get 1st (and MAYBE 2nd) so I can go on to the Grand Prix in SOUTH KOREA!!!  How cool would that be?!  Plus it would be great for my records.  I love how they were complaining about me not being enthusiastic.  The minute things get competitive, the minute I start loving it.  Maybe I was just worn out from the venturing trip and all the drama that went on with it.  And I missed skating but was totally thrown back into it which was miserable.  But I love it now!

On 11/11 I am looking forward to Sectionals and I NEED a 1st place in that competition.

On the OWT front.  Saturday, I got a call from “Miss B.” who was like, “I heard you were skeptical at being accepted, congratulations, you are!  We can’t wait to meet you in person!”  So I guess I’m in!  Guess who is really flying on a private plane to Paris over Christmas!  Little old me!  Well, not old, haha.  I got my confirmation packet too.  I’m really excited about this but I hope the girls are nice… otherwise it wouldn’t really be worth it, although I guess it’s not really costing me anything.  I’m kind-of nervous!  Imagine, me nervous!

A Strange Phone Call

I’m taking a lunch break with my laptop and just had to blog about the phone call I got yesterday afternoon.  I was reading Picture Perfect by Jodi Picoult (really good so far) before I left for work and Mom told me I had a phone call.  Totally typical, right?  Except on the other end of the line wasn’t Rita (who, by the way, is going to a community college so that’s why we can hang out) or Tabby or one of the girls from the rental counter or even Coach OH! (though she never calls).  It was some girl from OWT.

OWT is this thing I found out about when I was starting high school.  It stands for Our World Today and it’s a special program at Shoreline Private Boarding School.  You work with people in all different grades and you go to a lot of conferences and foreign countries for “experiential learning”.  I wanted to apply but it was at the same time I was REALLY starting to get serious about skating; I was going to junior worlds that year.  And since to be in the middle/high school program you have to go to the boarding school, I didn’t apply.  (It’s also really ridiculously expensive but if you get in – which is really hard – they can almost guarantee you a scholarship because so many foreign dignitaries and big companies sponsor it as they send their kids there.)  Since it was a pilot program, their first graduates just left two years ago and there were only two of them.  Last year they had 3 but this year they had 6 or 7 and decided to expand the program more, since the grads are attached to the program.  They wanted to create somewhat of an alumni network and continue the program in some way at the grads’ colleges, so they developed OWT College Connections.  Basically, its a way of ensuring the girls get to come back to Shoreline for mentoring through their OWT teachers and for events (apparently they all go to France for Christmas at the royal palace… are you KIDDING me?!).  Also, since their core class is moving up in age and they are all really attached, and because the director eventually wants to step down and have someone else teach the class, this “class” (10th grade-junior in college) is set in stone and they will not be connected directly with any new entrants below the 10th grade level.  Also, because the class wants to continue to foster community, they opened up the College Connections program (which I see as sort-of a sorority) to any student in a college that an OWT grad is attending.  I think you can still apply if an OWT grad doesn’t go to your college but it’s harder to go in and they want to have an original OWT person there to keep the sorority feel.  The CC program is also supposed to work as job networking and a support program.  And you still get to go on trips with them.

I applied to the CC program since it was available for my college, Creighton.  (I picked Creighton because Coach OH! has family in Omaha and was planning to move there to start her own skate club.  I didn’t want a new coach and she said if I was going to college there she’d stay in ME with me until I went to college.  How nice of her!  Anyway, I also picked Crieghton because I really liked the atmosphere.)  To get into OWT you have to have some special trait, and you also have to be really smart.  It helps if you’re a princess or something, but there are girls from all walks of life in it (they have profiles of the members on their webpage).  The same applies for CC.

Well today I got a call from a girl named Samantha.  Literally, this is how the conversation went:

Me: Hello?
Samantha: Hi, I’m Samantha Parkington, and I’m the Class President of the Our World Today program at Shoreline Private Boarding School.  I’m calling to tell you that our executive team has reviewed your application and we have accepted you into the College Connections program.
Me: Wait… is this a joke?  You’re a student, right?  Shouldn’t the teacher be calling?
Samantha: Oh, Miss B. is at a political rally, don’t even get me started.  But I work with her for student government and she told me I could go ahead and call you and it would be more personal or something.
Me: Are you serious?
Samantha: (laughs) Yeah!  Um, I know it’s kind of strange for you to hear me call you to say you’re accepted, but our program works differently so it’s not strange to me.  I mean, two years ago two of my classmates sent a fake acceptance letter to a girl who wasn’t slated to be accepted yet and Miss B. didn’t kick her out or get mad.  She said it showed initiative and if they wanted her in the class so badly, she should stay.
Me: Wow.  That’s kind-of crazy.
Samantha: Well she was a little mad because it got her in trouble with the principal, but it’s a huge inside joke now.  But um, now that you’re in, I’m going to send you the acceptance materials, well MB will, which will include a letter of introduction to the other new student joining our class.  And, um, I’ll need to know if you’re going to show up to Paris this Christmas.  And do you need a scholarship to get there?
Me: Yeah, um, a scholarship would be helpful, do I have to decide now?
Samantha: Well, my parents can get you a ticket basically for free, so it’s cool.  We could even grab you on the way there.  Or you can ask Marie, because she has a private plane, and it’s her house anyway.
Me: Marie, as in Marie Elizabeth Westoff, the Crown Princess of France?
Samantha: Um, yeah.
Me: Wow.
Samantha: I probably should tell you right now that I’m a Princess of Monaco.
Me: Uh…
Samantha: Marie and I are childhood friends.
Me: That’s crazy.
Samantha: (laughs) Yeah I guess.  Don’t talk to her about being a princess though, she hates it.  But, do you think you can come?  It’s a huge tradition.
Me: I’d have to check with my coach…
Samantha: Oh, okay.  It’d be best if you come to Paris because otherwise you’ll only meet me, Harper and Kit-Kat.  We’re the ones at Creighton.  Well, I’m a high school senior but Miss B. came here and she brought me with her and I’m trying to enroll next semester too, and then Miss B.’s sister is teaching the rest of the high school girls back home.
Me: Well, of course I want to go!
Samantha: Cool, just let me know.  The whole thing with contacting me is complicated, because somebody could be wiretapping me right now.  So I can’t give you a direct number yet, but you’ll get one.  Sorry, I can’t really be more specific.  And you can always just email Miss B. off the website and she’ll know it’s you.
Me: Okay.  Do you think you could have her call me to confirm this?
Samantha: Yeah, no problem.  Bye!

I still think it’s too good to be true.  I mean, a princess?  Really?  Even though I know there are foreign dignitaries’ kids in the program, I didn’t think it meant princesses.  I mean seriously.  And a free plane ticket to Paris?  I want to believe it; I thought the program sounded awesome and I know these are all aspects of it.  But I haven’t gotten my acceptance packet or a call from “Miss B.” yet, so I am still being skeptical for my own protection.

I’m in Massachusettes!

AND I GOT SILVER!!!

I came in first for short program (I was amazed) and third for long.  I guess my stylistic elements aren’t there but at least I still have some technique left in me!  Oh, I was so thrilled!  I started crying when I received my medal.  I’ve gotten first at regionals before, but never have I been prouder of myself.  I’ve seriously been back at skating for maybe two weeks, and I got second.  At regionals.

I also found it weird that it actually balanced out to 1st and 3rd, but whatever.  I placed, which is all that matters.  And I feel like I’m now worthy of my placement on Team C – I was 8th at Worlds last year and 4th at Nationals, but I took off for so long that I seriously worried I’d disqualify myself.  And I didn’t.  I would’ve liked first place (actually, under normal circumstances, I would think I deserved first place), but the important thing is now I can qualify for nationals.  The only problem is that I’m using the same short program as last season and I’m using a long program we came up with in basically two months.  But I’m apparently getting better at it (that’s all we’ve been doing in practices).  I’m excited.

I really want first in nationals.  I KNOW that is crazy to think about, but hey, why not?  I’ve done so many things with my life already, why not go for it?  And it would get me on Team A… haha.

And I go dancing…

I’m sorry for not posting… but I was so dangerously tired.  Well, maybe not dangerously.  But seriously, I have been totally exhausted the past few days.

Let’s start with Coach OH!’s reaction to me being allowed to skate.  I told her the minute I got to the rink.  And instead of congratulating me for being able to continue, she flipped out in typical Coach OH! fashion.  “Cate, what does that mean that your platelet counts are low?  Because if that’s dangerous, you need to take care of yourself before you collapse on the ice.”  I sighed.  She always gets her medical stuff wrong, but it’s cute how she does.  I love medicine, so I don’t mind explaining.

“Coach OH!, it’s red blood cells that would make me faint.  If I was anemic or had a low red count.  Low platelets just meant I was not having a good clotting day.  Dr. K. said it was probably just a fluke – lots of people have extremely bloody nosebleeds.  It’s not anything to worry about.”

Coach didn’t seem convinced, but I didn’t really want to talk about it so I just went and twirled around and then she yelled at me for being unprofessional, because I wasn’t practicing my actual routine.  Well, no, I was just celebrating my ability to skate.  Apparently that didn’t fly because I missed the morning anyway.  She worked me SO hard!  And then she threw a curveball at me.  She wants me to start taking ballet, because it would help improve my flexibility.  Mom thought this was an amazing idea when I told her after I got home.  I really don’t.  I mean, ballet is pretty, but I really don’t have time.  They both thought it would also help me break up my routine and get a little more enthusiastic about skating practice.

Enthusiastic?  I about killed both of them.  I’m the one who was pushing to KEEP skating, and now Coach OH! and Mom both thought on their own accord that I need to be more enthusiastic about skating.  Like they weren’t telling me five minutes ago that I should stop skating.  And like I don’t want to go to the Olympics.  I am totally dedicated.  I really don’t get it.  But I guess I’m doing ballet anyway.  So guess when I have ballet?  8:30 – 10 pm, every Tuesday/Thursday, and from 9-12 on Saturday.  That means Tuesday and Thursday I’m going to be rushing straight from work to ballet.  And then on Saturday, when I’m supposed to be recovering from being totally sore all week, I’m doing ballet, which will make me even more sore and tired.

I guess I am a little excited though, mostly about the beauty of it.  I think learning ballet will add a lot to my choreography.  I can be a lot more lyrical and poised.  But I don’t think I need to get more flexible.  Who knows.  I’d fight it, but if it’ll help me get to Vancouver… than I really can’t complain.

The rental counter Monday was fun.  I had that mom come up who wanted the new-but-broken-in-skates, and she thanked me for the info on buying skates.  That was really cool.  Then Chrissy, the girl who runs the counter, invited us all to go rollerblading!  I’ve actually never been rollerblading.  It’ll be really fun.  I wonder if I’m any good?  The counter was fun at first on Tuesday – we were all talking and laughing at this one boy who was trying to learn how to skate backwards.  I know, I know, we shouldn’t be laughing… but seriously, it was hilarious.  Then the conversation changed and I got totally annoyed.  We were talking about what music we like to listen to, and Abby said her favorite band was Rascal Flatts, and she loved “Skin”.

I flipped out.  I hate that song, because it reminds me of all the bad stuff that comes with being an oncologist.  And I can’t take my patients to the prom or something, I can only try to help them get better.  I hope I encourage my patients.  But who knows.  And Abby knows totally nothing about leukemia or anything.  She was just like, it’s cute at the end.

Oh and, by the way, if my life wasn’t exhausting enough, I’m leaving in two hours for Massachusettes to go to regionals!  I’m doing my “Jupiter” routine for the long program.  (We developed it last spring because we knew I’d be out for awhile.)  Should be fun.